Sometime this week (Thursday to be precise) I will celebrate my 21st wedding anniversary (ironically, so will Kevin). I think it's odd that, in my brain, I still haven't been alive long enough to be celebrating 21 years of anything. But, the body reads differently. The body says, "girrrrlll, you are olllldddd!". I often use the words "shut up" to my body.

This was us shortly after we met in June of 1987. I was working the mullet for all it was worth. About six months after we met we surprised ourselves by realizing we might be in something akin to "love". The next year was a blur of moving and living on our own in faraway places like Stockton, California, Austin, Tx and Rutherfordton, N.C.

In October of 1988, in a hotel room in San Francisco, California, Kevin asked for my hand in marriage. I told him he could have all of me. He didn't realize what that would mean in the future when there would be so much more of me to love.

The day we initially set up for our date was a year later October 14th, 1989...for some reason that didn't work out with the church schedule so we settled on October 21st, 1989. This also happened to be Sweetest Day. Touching, I know.

Since I am a history buff, I thought it would be fun to look up what was going on in October of 1989. I vaguely remembered an earthquake (yes, vaguely...I was getting married for goodness sake) Sure enough the Loma Prieta earthquake (also known as the World Series Earthquake due to the fact that the World Series between the Oakland A's and the San Francisco Giants was being played. This earthquake was the first American earthquake to have its initial tremors witnessed on live television as the teams were warming up on the field at the time) struck at 5:04 PM on October 17th. It measured 7.1 on the Richter Scale and killed 67 or 63 (depending on which conflicting Wikipedia report to believe) people and delayed the World Series for ten days. I do distinctly remember the Bay Bridge collapsed on itself. Only a year before I had driven across that bridge myself a couple of times when we lived in Stockton. I'm not a fan of driving across bridges so the fact that one I had been on, collapsed on itself was, to say the least, unnerving.

For those of you who (whom?) are enjoying this beautiful fall weather we are having, I will tell you that, twenty one years ago tomorrow we received several inches of snow. It was beautiful really, big, fat, heavy, wet snowflakes that decorated the world in a way that I love. Two days later the sun was shining and it was in the 60's again. I live in Michigan because it is as unpredictable as I am.

I don't remember much about my wedding and less about my reception, and no, I wasn't drinking. It was just a long time ago. I know we have a fun story that is actually clean enough for public regaling. But, it is one of Kevin's favorites so you'll just have to wait until he gets a blog (HA). Just suffice to say that if ONE person gets out of a hot tub to turn on the jets...the water level goes down considerably and the jets may only be partially covered.

We honeymooned in Jamaica. We dove off a cliff into water so clear you could see the bottom...it didn't really seem to be safe to jump, but we did...kind of metaphoric (I love me a good metaphor) of marriage in general. This world shows us so clearly what a bad marriage looks like. We rarely get to view the good ones because it just isn't an interesting story. But, even knowing that it could go badly, we jumped into marriage...barely knowing each other honestly. Because, loving someone is nothing like living with someone...sharing the good and the bad, the ups and the downs and promising not to walk away even though sometimes the person you love most in the world is also the person whom you hurt or are hurt by the most. Also, while on our honeymoon, we ate goat meat. There is not metaphor for that. It was nasty. I got so excited one morning to see a box of Fruit Loops straight from the cereal city on the buffet. I tore into those babies with the energy of someone who had been fed goat meat for four straight days, only to find them stale. What a disappointment. I guess there is a metaphor there. The outside does not always keep its promises.

So 21 years, if you go by what my kids say, this is our "golden" anniversary. After all a "golden birthday" is when you turn the age of your birth date. So we celebrate 21 years on the 21st. Also, 21 is my favorite number. Am I too old to have a favorite number?...perhaps...but I'm also too old to laugh every time I hear the word "duty" but I still do.

Our marriage has not been without it's challenges but I am always a bit befuddled when someone talks about marriage being tough. I think being married is the best thing ever, and if I'm being honest, my marriage saved my life. It also gave me this...

And lots of other good things like a friend that has to hang out with me whether he wants to or not. And someone to refer my kids to when I don't feel like dealing with whatever they're whining about (i.e. "I'm sure your dad would love to help you with that situation".) And someone to laugh with when our kids say ridiculous things

(i.e. "you guys just don't understand how tough my life is") I like being married a lot. I think I specifically like being married to Kevin a lot.

It feels like just yesterday we got married but it also feels like a lifetime ago...six lifetimes ago to be more precise. I wonder if the people in San Francisco and Oakland feel the same way...?

By the way. I read the whole Wikipedia entry on the year 1989 and though you might also find this interesting.

Jan 24th, 1989 (which happened to be Kevin's "golden birthday") was the day that serial killer Ted Bundy was executed. This is what my beloved, soon-to-be husband looked like on that day. We were living in Austin, Texas.

Also on July 31st, 1989, Nintendo released the first Game Boy. In August, on the 20th, the Menendez brothers killed their parents (probably developed "violent tendencies" from too many hand held video games). And, in November, the East and West Germans began tearing down the Berlin wall. Also sometime in the year the last Golden Toad was seen, they are now extinct. I accept no blame for this. I was young and in love and I'm pretty sure the only thing we killed that year was the goat our bus driver mowed down on our honeymoon. And I feel like I've made amends with the goat population.

Pardon me...I've been busy...

I'm not complaining! I LOVE my life...but it is a busy one. So I'm not just making excuses...except a little bit I am...is it an "excuse" if it is true? Apparently our local high school does not think so as they no longer allow for "excused absences" for illness or "the like". But, this would be a digression in what I intended to talk about and, since I know you are all excited for me to get to the meat of the blog I will not digress. I've been busy...enough said.

A lot of people are flabbergasted by our choice to homeschool our children. (I'm not sure if they are actually "flabbergasted" but isn't that a delightful word?) I've heard everything from. "If I homeschooled ____ (insert child's name here) I would kill him/her". Which we know is likely not true...because those with true homicidal tendencies rarely announce them. If Jeffrey Dahmer would have said to each that came to his door..."if you come in I will likely kill and eat you", his killing spree would have come to an end much sooner. I'm getting off track again. I don't really think any competent mother would kill their child if they had to educate them. But, I do understand what they are saying. Because, even as I type this paragraph about how much I love having my children home, I am secretly wishing they would go away and quit asking me questions so I could concentrate on what I'm doing...which is writing about how much I love them being near me. Irony? I'd say definitely. I've also heard, "I'm not qualified to home school". Well, anyone is really...who taught your child to walk, talk and tie their shoes (okay, so Bryan can't tie his shoes yet, but we're working on it) The point is, I'm NOT qualified to teach a classroom of thirty children with thirty different learning styles. But, with time, attention and love I can teach my one child what he/she needs to know. And, when we're together all day there is plenty of all those to go around.

But, as in any blessed life, the good outweighs the bad (except in my body where I simply outweigh things I wish I didn't). I LOVE having my two youngest sons home each day. I love that we get out of bed when we want instead of me (crabby, which I would be) pulling them out of their covers each morning while it is still dark outside. I love that they can ask me any question they want (including but not limited to: Is blood considered a liquid? Why does Peppermint Patty talk like a man? And, If you dropped a cat from here would it die?) I love that they can go to the bathroom whenever they need to (and because they are boys...almost wherever they need to...but that is just a plumbing thing...not a home schooling thing). I love that our learning is not all done in front of a text book...because really, life has no text books and learning needs to be done on the go!

This is what I mean...this is how boys learn. This picture just makes me smile! Plus the colors are awesome. I somehow made it smaller than I wanted to when I transferred it and I can't get it bigger...so please imagine it bigger because that is how it was intended. And that is metaphoric really. The world is my sons' textbook and the world is HUGE...like I wanted the picture to be. It is also metaphoric because we don't always get what we want. I would like my older children to still be home with me. I would like to educate them as well. But, they want to play sports, they want to see their friends everyday, they want to go to the Prom. And, I'm okay with it because they have a base that we built for them. They know high school is a manufactured reality that is nothing like the "real world" they hear so much about from the grown-ups that surround them each day. They know that God doesn't grade on a curve or straight scale and that God is the only one that is truly qualified to grade them at all. They know that even if they "bomb" in chemistry or geography that, when it comes time, they will learn what they need to know for their career of choice and they will excel because they have been taught to do whatever they do as though they were working for God and not for man. I'm not suggesting that they will be perfect...I'm just suggesting that they have been told. What they choose to do with that information remains in their control. Parenting is a crap shoot for sure. Which brings us full circle to why I home school. Parenting IS a crapshoot and anyone who gambles knows that the more time you spend at the craps table the more you are likely to walk away with a win now and then. Okay...that is a crappy metaphor (ha ha..."crappy" I didn't even mean to do that...I'm punny even when I'm not intending to be). What I'm saying...is I've invested in the crapshoot and I'm not going to walk away from table while I still have a chance to rub the dice, blow on them for luck and roll away.